She's Ba-a-ack; on Autopilot and Sometimes Out of Body

I can't believe how long it has been since I shared my thoughts with you.  Where we left off was in terrible grief over Tundra.  She was taken to the Humane Society on Friday afternoon, and after being assessed as too old, and, having killed, was not adoptable.  She would be euthanized later that day.  On Saturday I got the notion that I should have got rid of the sheep instead.  I began a fantasy scenario, whereby she wasn't put down on Friday because the vet got sick, and because it was the weekend, perhaps she is still alive, and I could phone and rescue her.  I imagined this scenario all weekend, and phoned at the earliest moment on Monday--but alas, it was too late.  After the euphoria of the fantasy of the weekend, I was shattered all over again.  I couldn't put her stuff away, I imagined that she had run away and would miraculously find her way home.  After about 1 week of crying almost constantly, it began to get a little, just a little better.  I put away her things, and I avoided vacuuming in case I found Tundra-weed (Tundra hair bunnies).   But Tundra had the decency to not even shed in her last few days home--this loyalty made me cry again.  Now I'm still sad, but it's bearable.  I can now look at her last photos--she didn't like to have her picture taken because of the flash.  (And I'm crying again as I write this).

After it was too late, I thought of all sorts of alternate solutions, solutions that would not require her to be tied up (which I abhor--dogs tied up for great lengths of time).  Seriously, getting rid of the sheep and getting more Llamas instead.  I do so miss her.  At first I couldn't even interact with Daisy and Sparky, aftaid that if I bonded any more I might lose them, too.

So now, onto the rest of life.  Everything else is busy and interesting, and frustrating and satisfying.

A week later I was working in the greenhouse, when, just before lunch, I felt a terrible squeezing in my chest, and the pain radiated up my neck.  I got sweaty and clammy, so I asked Kubota Man to take me to the hospital.  They sure give you the royal treatment when you have chest pains.  The protocol is to take blood, start an IV, take an ECG, and then watch you for 6+ hours, at which time they repeat the tests.  When you have heart muscle damage, an enzyme is released into the bloodstream which indicates a heart attack.  While they have your blood they also test for pancreas and liver indicators, as these organs may cause similar symptoms.  All tests are normal, Oxygen levels good.  Discharged at 9 pm--only liquids, water, juice and jello--I was bored and starving.  I went home with these souvenirs of the event--since I was dehydrated, the nurse, who goes to church with me, blew 2 veins before getting the IV in. I had taken an aspirin as a precaution, so my blood was good and thin.  My battle scars sure got me a lot of attention in the next week or so.

In this same time interval my quarterly Sales Tax report had to be submitted, as well as the Income Tax.  These little bits of business were done after a long day of working in the greenhouse.  Since our Income Tax Reports print out at 24 pages (for each of us), I took the plunge and filed electronically, and went to the bank the next day to pay the tax owing.  I'm kind of nervous about the electronic filing, since each return filed in just seconds--24 pages gone in seconds?  But I got a confirmation page to print out, so I hope it's all OK.  This was all due on April 30, I did it on April 28.  And on that day most of southern Alberta froze over, with a huge snowstorm that closed highways for hours--we didn't get any storm at our place.
I managed to finish the Bamboo Socks in Summer shades (from Mary Maxim).

I also completed the embroidery on the Christmas Stoking.  I will sew them into stockings in the fall.

Then I almost forgot that I had newspaper articles to write--our local paper prints every 2 weeks, and I write a gardening article in each edition.  For one edition I wrote about the use of shrubs in the landscape, and one about some basic garden lore.  And re-design our newspaper ads, submit the proofs, and establish the advertising schedule in 2 newspapers.

My next embroidery project should be SIL's Christmas stocking--a golfing Santa, but I don't know where I placed the charts,so I started a 3-D stand-up cross-stitched nativity scene.  This is the cover of the kit, showing all 11 pieces.

I have finished stitching the Blessed Virgin, and am working on one of the Magi.

The Friday just past, was our local High School's Mother's Day Strawberry Tea, Bake Sale and Plant Sale.  We give them a lot of plants at a discount, then they sell them at their event, and then we allow them to return unsold plants, of which there are usually very few.  I had to get everything ready on Wednesday, since on Thursdays I teach religion and visit Mom in the Nursing Home, then go grocery shopping 35 miles away.  The kids come on Thursday afternoon to pick up the plants, then they bring back the remnants on Friday afternoon.  They did well again this year.

Now I'm all finished transplanting (except some late petunias which won't be ready for a couple of weeks.  We had to set up the greenhouses for May 1 opening, the trees, shrubs and perennials had to be brought out of winter storage, and all this is why I'm on autopilot. We are so tired, it feels like we are operating out-of-body.  My mind isn't in sync with what the body is doing--it's as if I'm watching myself doing everything.  These few weeks I am grumpy.

Now it's mostly maintenance and customer service, which is quite a job anyways.  On Friday the first shipment of new trees and shrubs came in.  They need to be inventoried, priced and put away.  The next shipment is coming on Tuesday.

I am hoping that this  picture of an unusual Mosaic Geranium will make you curious to visit my other blog Weed it and Reap

On Sunday I went to church, proclaimed Scripture, and the Knights of Columbus honored all the mothers, grandmothers and great-grandmothers with a carnation.  When I got home, all the kids had phoned to wish me Happy Mother's Day (we don't celebrate because we are far apart,and some have to work.), those calls just made my day.

  During this season, I have to really organize my time to be able to get away to church on Sundays, but we still have to work that day,too.  Also yesterday, I got to work in a flower bed when the other work was done. That was a joy.  All the pain and fatigue lessened when I was outside, saw the geese fly over, and heard the robins. 

I am truly blessed.